It cost me more than I would've liked. But even if I gained Reyna's distrust and anger, plus some others, I cemented the fact that she was not involved in that murder.
[ and though he can feel the stress beating him senseless, it's nothing he can't calm down with some alcohol.
so he drinks. ]
I don't regret it. So if you're here to tell me off, do it quickly.
I have. She did not accept it. [ and he'll finish his drink with that! ] I don't mind, considering she's rightfully angry and that she said she would still think about it.
[ he sighs ]
She thinks she's all pragmatism, but inside she's still a teenager. A teenager thrust into war too soon.
I told you just now, didn't I? I was in a war, too. Around her age.
[ not only that, but the memory sharing...but he won't disclose any of that. no, those are things he will keep to himself, and that he will have to find out from reyna on his own. ]
Though the war was not a common one, it still took lives. It left scars. [ on him, at least. psychological ones. ] I was a stupid teenager looking for honor and recognition and thinking I could handle a war against far more powerful enemies. I obtained the recognition I had so foolishly craved...but lost far too much along the way.
[ he closes his eyes for a second, taking the moment to serve himself a drink in order to down it in one shot. ]
Don't get me wrong, though, Jae-Ha. I don't think she regrets her lifestyle. It's just that she was thrust into it way too soon.
[What Jae-ha doesn't say is that some people are born into war, and they know nothing else in their life. He keeps it to himself, because he's not here to argue. He knows that it's just how Waver talks - like he knows better than everyone else in the room - but some part of it still irks at Jae-ha's personal experience.
The part of him that believes everyone should be able to be free - and that includes expectations from other people.
He drinks quietly.]
... you still talk like she's one of your students.
And not your partner.
Maybe you should have a conversation about that, first.
[ waver's expression doesn't budge, even when jae-ha prods him with criticism. maybe it's because he's used to it. maybe it's because he doesn't think he's doing anything wrong in the first place.
he folds his hands on his lap. ]
I don't want her to steer herself into self-destruction, that's all.
[ now THAT'S going to get an eyebrow raise out of waver ]
I'm not holding a physical nor metaphorical leash around Lady Reyna. She's free to do as she pleases with whomever she pleases because she is not my daughter nor am I her professor. Did I grow nervous at the end of the trial? Yes I did. That's why I did what I did, and I apologized for it. But I do not regret it, because I gain nothing with regret.
And while she may not be my student, she is my partner and that means that she has expectations from me as I have expectations from her. If that is your idea of having a leash on someone, then fine, but I don't agree with you.
You know as well as I do that 'having expectations of your partner' is not the same thing as being controlling.
[Jae-ha's great at feigning to be an idiot, and sometimes he really is an idiot, but he blinks at the notion that he could confuse the two.]
Because in essence - that's what you chose to do at the trial. You forced her into something. I came to have a conversation with you because I was trying to understand why - you've painted something of a target on your back, which I didn't believe you deserved.
But when you say things like you don't wish her toward self-destruction, when you're the one who aided in her being suspected in the first place, it doesn't make much sense - does it?
I wondered if this is your tendency to speak as a professor, the tone that makes you so condescending, considering the fact that Reyna's been nothing but upfront in trials.
Now I'm just wondering if you're bad at reading people.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
You're right.
I wanted to talk to you.
... you pulled quite a risky gambit at the end of the trial, after all.
no subject
[ and though he can feel the stress beating him senseless, it's nothing he can't calm down with some alcohol.
so he drinks. ]
I don't regret it. So if you're here to tell me off, do it quickly.
no subject
[He's in the habit of asking questions until he reaches some semblance of understanding with what's going on with everything around him.]
... I just wonder - have you apologized?
no subject
[ he sighs ]
She thinks she's all pragmatism, but inside she's still a teenager. A teenager thrust into war too soon.
no subject
And what are your experiences that make you so sure that you know better than her?
no subject
[ not only that, but the memory sharing...but he won't disclose any of that. no, those are things he will keep to himself, and that he will have to find out from reyna on his own. ]
Though the war was not a common one, it still took lives. It left scars. [ on him, at least. psychological ones. ] I was a stupid teenager looking for honor and recognition and thinking I could handle a war against far more powerful enemies. I obtained the recognition I had so foolishly craved...but lost far too much along the way.
[ he closes his eyes for a second, taking the moment to serve himself a drink in order to down it in one shot. ]
Don't get me wrong, though, Jae-Ha. I don't think she regrets her lifestyle. It's just that she was thrust into it way too soon.
no subject
The part of him that believes everyone should be able to be free - and that includes expectations from other people.
He drinks quietly.]
... you still talk like she's one of your students.
And not your partner.
Maybe you should have a conversation about that, first.
no subject
he folds his hands on his lap. ]
I don't want her to steer herself into self-destruction, that's all.
no subject
Do your good intentions blind you to the fact that you're being controlling, as well as condescending?
no subject
[ now THAT'S going to get an eyebrow raise out of waver ]
I'm not holding a physical nor metaphorical leash around Lady Reyna. She's free to do as she pleases with whomever she pleases because she is not my daughter nor am I her professor. Did I grow nervous at the end of the trial? Yes I did. That's why I did what I did, and I apologized for it. But I do not regret it, because I gain nothing with regret.
And while she may not be my student, she is my partner and that means that she has expectations from me as I have expectations from her. If that is your idea of having a leash on someone, then fine, but I don't agree with you.
no subject
[Jae-ha's great at feigning to be an idiot, and sometimes he really is an idiot, but he blinks at the notion that he could confuse the two.]
Because in essence - that's what you chose to do at the trial. You forced her into something. I came to have a conversation with you because I was trying to understand why - you've painted something of a target on your back, which I didn't believe you deserved.
But when you say things like you don't wish her toward self-destruction, when you're the one who aided in her being suspected in the first place, it doesn't make much sense - does it?
I wondered if this is your tendency to speak as a professor, the tone that makes you so condescending, considering the fact that Reyna's been nothing but upfront in trials.
Now I'm just wondering if you're bad at reading people.