[In truth, Jae-ha doesn't care to monopolize or dwell on his suffering. Objectively, he can agree that his first week in this castle was disastrous. Losing his Captain, being betrayed by his own partner, thinking that there was a good chance he'd be left for dead -
Souji has outranked that by far.
It's why he's not surprised when Souji seems to be unsteady after it all, and why he's immediately going to step in the second that he looks like he might lose his footing.
[Considering he's pretty lightheaded, it takes him a second to actually register what happened. He'd lost his balance a little too much to correct for, and then - arms? Hm.
Jae-ha will find him easy to carry, at least. He's thin to begin with, hasn't been eating well for days. He also doesn't struggle. Really, since the start of the execution, he's shown a remarkable amount of poise. He'd decided the night before, as soon as Yasusada had requested his hand in execution, that he needed to keep himself held together however he possibly could. There's no room for selfishness here. He can't keep worrying people.
He doesn't want to deal with yet another loved one looking at him like they've failed him.]
--I can still walk.
[Being useless and burdensome isn't what he wants at all.]
Do you want to? I can put you down - but I suppose my arms moved on their own, as I'd rather keep you close to me for as long as I can.
[There's some part of it that's a pretty line that aims for comfort, some kindness that Souji might want to hear, but he doesn't back down from it. There's a sincerity it too. He's worried, but he won't trample on Souji's wishes in order to show that.]
But if you're tired, it's alright if you lean on me.
[This is Okita "I will walk 500 miles and I will walk 500 more when I'm literally 6 months away from dying just because you told me to" Souji and his stamina is SURPRISINGLY HIGH...
But he still needs a break after all of... that. It's more emotionally wearing than anything, but high stress doesn't even do a healthy body good and his sure isn't. If it wasn't obvious at the beginning when he'd been hopping around and taking Sousei's snacks, it sure has just become more and more apparent as the weeks have ticked by.
As if finding some sort of permission in Jae-ha's words, he laughs a little. It's a tired, tired sound.]
Well, if it's something that gives you comfort...
[His stupid ass is like 5 seconds away from briefly blacking out.]
[Somehow, in this moment, Souji feels more fragile than Captain Gi-gan ever did - and yet Jae-ha managed to lose her far sooner. So he keeps Souji in his arms and takes quiet steps away from the chaos of the execution sight, away from everyone else and their panic, and their discomfort. One at a time, Jae-ha has to be where he thinks he's needed.
Yet instead of any of that, all he cares to share is a playful - ]
I'm a bit selfish that way - I enjoy having you in my arms a bit too much.
[He'll probably feel bad for taking up so much of Jae-ha's attention sooner or later, honestly, since that's just the way he is. Selfish and wanting to be cared for and spoiled, but understanding that it's awful of him.
For now, though, he just fucking wheezes because he's having a bad health week. Is that a laugh?? MAYBE... It might just be a wheeze, though. He doesn't seem to be 100% conscious right now. Jae-ha will never be able to carry Souji with so little fussing again until Souji inevitably dies.
They're also a few steps away from the dormitories when his breathing seems to hitch and then-- stop. Hm!! There's tensing; it's the kind you'd expect from someone who's holding back hiccups or a sneeze or, you know, really bad coughing.]
Souji at least seems to snap into better wakefulness once his chest starts to burn in that all too familiar way, and he's kind of struggling like he wants to sit up in Jae-ha's arms. For the question:]
Water, pl--
[Whoops nope his hand's flying up to clamp over his mouth instead, because he knows when he's lost his battle with holding back an attack. Jae-ha's probably heard him cough here and there, especially over the last week, but this is - well. It's a fit: an upward rising crescendo of coughing that gets worse and worse until his body is spasming a little from the force of it. They're also... really gross-sounding... Wet and getting wetter until it's almost like he's choking on something.
Which he is, kind of.
Also, there's blood!! On a particularly hard set of coughs, it drips past his hand and may or may not just dribble onto Jae-ha gracefully.]
Jae-ha pauses, surprised - and then increasingly alarmed. He watches Souji cover his mouth and his brow furrows as he immediately, but carefully, moves to take them into the closest room behind a closed door. He places Souji down on the nearest surface, out of sight from anyone who might've just been wandering by outside.]
Hold on.
[He doesn't seem to be mindful of the blood on himself? There are bigger fish to fry. He disappears quickly, dashing into the nearest room to grab the first cloth he finds. We're gonna say it's the kitchen and it's one of the towels, and then he offers that to Souji first.]
[He couldn't hold back at this point even if he tried, it's fine, they're fine, HE'S FINE.
Except that by the time Jae-ha's back he's just like hacked up a small pool of blood into his hands because Anime TB™ is wild. He'll reach out for the towel without so much as a nod of acknowledgment, immediately muffling the rest of his coughing into it, which lasts another twenty or thirty seconds that stretches on Forever to his sickly ass.
The fit doesn't subside elegantly, either. He's left gasping for air through wet and rattling lungs, hands shaking from exertion as the reflexive tension starts to ebb away. It takes him a little while before he's able to even out his breathing enough to say anything. After he mops some of the remaining blood from his face, it's probably not surprising that the first thing he manages is:]
Jae-ha sits with him first, settling next to Souji and rubbing his back even through his coughs and he waits until it subsides. He watches in case it seems to be getting worse - how could it get worse? he figures he'll see it if it happens - and doesn't manage more than his worried expression. It's a terrible fit, he can tell that much, and when Souji expresses his gratitude, he shakes his head.]
... It's nothing. Hold on, I'll be back.
[But he didn't want to leave Souji coughing all by himself.
He disappears again to the kitchen, retrieving that glass of water and then wandering back to Souji, moving to stay next to him again and offering it out whenever he seems like he'd want to reach for it.]
[Jae-ha is a true pal, and he gets a little nod in response to the offer of assistance. Not that he'll take him up on it... No more than necessary, anyway. Once Souji's breathing is a little more settled and some of the tremors have left his hands and arms, he carefully reaches out to take the glass with another murmured thanks. Just a few sips - just enough to clear his throat so that he can talk a little better.
With the careful and precise way that he starts to clean up after himself and reassemble his health, it's clear that this isn't anything new to him.]
...I'm sorry you had to see that.
[Normally he's a little better at catching his fits before they start. But normally he isn't also dealing with a deadass vice-commander and a sword he's had to execute, so.]
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week 3, sunday
Souji has outranked that by far.
It's why he's not surprised when Souji seems to be unsteady after it all, and why he's immediately going to step in the second that he looks like he might lose his footing.
And neatly catch him, and pick him up.]
... let's get you somewhere quiet.
no subject
Jae-ha will find him easy to carry, at least. He's thin to begin with, hasn't been eating well for days. He also doesn't struggle. Really, since the start of the execution, he's shown a remarkable amount of poise. He'd decided the night before, as soon as Yasusada had requested his hand in execution, that he needed to keep himself held together however he possibly could. There's no room for selfishness here. He can't keep worrying people.
He doesn't want to deal with yet another loved one looking at him like they've failed him.]
--I can still walk.
[Being useless and burdensome isn't what he wants at all.]
no subject
Do you want to? I can put you down - but I suppose my arms moved on their own, as I'd rather keep you close to me for as long as I can.
[There's some part of it that's a pretty line that aims for comfort, some kindness that Souji might want to hear, but he doesn't back down from it. There's a sincerity it too. He's worried, but he won't trample on Souji's wishes in order to show that.]
But if you're tired, it's alright if you lean on me.
no subject
But he still needs a break after all of... that. It's more emotionally wearing than anything, but high stress doesn't even do a healthy body good and his sure isn't. If it wasn't obvious at the beginning when he'd been hopping around and taking Sousei's snacks, it sure has just become more and more apparent as the weeks have ticked by.
As if finding some sort of permission in Jae-ha's words, he laughs a little. It's a tired, tired sound.]
Well, if it's something that gives you comfort...
[His stupid ass is like 5 seconds away from briefly blacking out.]
no subject
It does.
[Somehow, in this moment, Souji feels more fragile than Captain Gi-gan ever did - and yet Jae-ha managed to lose her far sooner. So he keeps Souji in his arms and takes quiet steps away from the chaos of the execution sight, away from everyone else and their panic, and their discomfort. One at a time, Jae-ha has to be where he thinks he's needed.
Yet instead of any of that, all he cares to share is a playful - ]
I'm a bit selfish that way - I enjoy having you in my arms a bit too much.
no subject
For now, though, he just fucking wheezes because he's having a bad health week. Is that a laugh?? MAYBE... It might just be a wheeze, though. He doesn't seem to be 100% conscious right now. Jae-ha will never be able to carry Souji with so little fussing again until Souji inevitably dies.
They're also a few steps away from the dormitories when his breathing seems to hitch and then-- stop. Hm!! There's tensing; it's the kind you'd expect from someone who's holding back hiccups or a sneeze or, you know, really bad coughing.]
no subject
... Souji? Are you alright? Do you need anything? Water?
[He'll ask first and then probably panic when he gets some kind of horrifying answer.]
no subject
Souji at least seems to snap into better wakefulness once his chest starts to burn in that all too familiar way, and he's kind of struggling like he wants to sit up in Jae-ha's arms. For the question:]
Water, pl--
[Whoops nope his hand's flying up to clamp over his mouth instead, because he knows when he's lost his battle with holding back an attack. Jae-ha's probably heard him cough here and there, especially over the last week, but this is - well. It's a fit: an upward rising crescendo of coughing that gets worse and worse until his body is spasming a little from the force of it. They're also... really gross-sounding... Wet and getting wetter until it's almost like he's choking on something.
Which he is, kind of.
Also, there's blood!! On a particularly hard set of coughs, it drips past his hand and may or may not just dribble onto Jae-ha gracefully.]
no subject
Jae-ha pauses, surprised - and then increasingly alarmed. He watches Souji cover his mouth and his brow furrows as he immediately, but carefully, moves to take them into the closest room behind a closed door. He places Souji down on the nearest surface, out of sight from anyone who might've just been wandering by outside.]
Hold on.
[He doesn't seem to be mindful of the blood on himself? There are bigger fish to fry. He disappears quickly, dashing into the nearest room to grab the first cloth he finds. We're gonna say it's the kitchen and it's one of the towels, and then he offers that to Souji first.]
Don't try to hold that back for my sake.
no subject
Except that by the time Jae-ha's back he's just like hacked up a small pool of blood into his hands because Anime TB™ is wild. He'll reach out for the towel without so much as a nod of acknowledgment, immediately muffling the rest of his coughing into it, which lasts another twenty or thirty seconds that stretches on Forever to his sickly ass.
The fit doesn't subside elegantly, either. He's left gasping for air through wet and rattling lungs, hands shaking from exertion as the reflexive tension starts to ebb away. It takes him a little while before he's able to even out his breathing enough to say anything. After he mops some of the remaining blood from his face, it's probably not surprising that the first thing he manages is:]
--Thank you.
[For the towel... A true comrade.]
no subject
Jae-ha sits with him first, settling next to Souji and rubbing his back even through his coughs and he waits until it subsides. He watches in case it seems to be getting worse - how could it get worse? he figures he'll see it if it happens - and doesn't manage more than his worried expression. It's a terrible fit, he can tell that much, and when Souji expresses his gratitude, he shakes his head.]
... It's nothing. Hold on, I'll be back.
[But he didn't want to leave Souji coughing all by himself.
He disappears again to the kitchen, retrieving that glass of water and then wandering back to Souji, moving to stay next to him again and offering it out whenever he seems like he'd want to reach for it.]
If you need me to assist you, just say so.
no subject
With the careful and precise way that he starts to clean up after himself and reassemble his health, it's clear that this isn't anything new to him.]
...I'm sorry you had to see that.
[Normally he's a little better at catching his fits before they start. But normally he isn't also dealing with a deadass vice-commander and a sword he's had to execute, so.]