week 0, sunday

[alttitude]

[It's as their leaving the execution sight that Jae-ha manages to see Sandalphon and he offers a smile:]

It seems that the Green Dragon does indeed get to survive another day.

Good news, isn't it?

Comments

[melancoffeea]

[Sandalphon bristles, and he snaps back in response.]

What do you know about him? I'm the one who doubted him in the first place. The fault lies with me. I was wrong!

[And it's hardly the fault of his progenitor that he turned out to be so unremarkable.]

[alttitude]

[It's complicated and difficult and Jae-ha knows what it's like to be told by someone that you know and respect that you're worthless and have nothing to offer and yet

to feel so fiercely defensive - ]

Did you love him?

[melancoffeea]

[His breath catches. Love? Is that a joke?]

Wha . . . what does that have to do with this?

[alttitude]

If there's anything more maddening, impossible, and temperamental than hate and spite -

It's love.

[His brow furrows.]

.... you don't have to tell me - but you know, it won't help anyone or anything if you can't stand to be a bit more honest with yourself.

[melancoffeea]

[He won't say anything about that. He refuses. What he feels about Lucifer is something he won't think upon—it'll only hurt.]

It doesn't matter. I'm useless either way; my feelings are irrelevant.

I LOST THIS I'M SORRY JAE

[alttitude]

Was he the one who told you that - or let you think that?

[His brow furrows.]

You're not useless, and ignoring your feelings isn't productive for you, or anyone around you.

my heart is broken, how could u

[melancoffeea]

He didn't tell me anything.

[Sandalphon grits his teeth. Productive, he says.]

That's enough. I have nothing more to say.

i love you

[alttitude]

[ . . . ]

I think you have plenty.

You know that it's alright to still be mad, don't you?

q3q

[melancoffeea]

[His teeth go slack as he scowls.]

I was angry for two thousand years. It's about time that I let go.

[alttitude]

And what do you think you have now - if you're trying to let it go? You know that there's still a chance for you to feel other things... don't you?

[melancoffeea]

Like what?

[alttitude]

There's plenty.

There's so many emotions available to work through that it's hard to begin naming them all - the grief, the happiness, the joy, the surprise, the sadness, the chance to open your heart and understand that love doesn't have to come with pain....

[ . . . . ]

It's worth a try.

[melancoffeea]

[He's quiet, if for a moment. Once, he felt all of those emotions. His answer now is clipped, monotonous.]

I am an archangel. Those feelings have no place in my being.

[alttitude]

Did someone else tell you that too? Is that what you were told you are?

Does it actually match up with what you feel?

[melancoffeea]

What do you know about what it means to be an archangel? Each of us is created with a purpose, and that task is paramount. Emotions are a distraction that hinders our ability to think logically.

My purpose may no longer be relevant, but I'm still an archangel.

[alttitude]

Because I know better than anyone else that just because you're given a purpose, that doesn't mean that it defines who you are - not if you don't want it to. Even if your entire body is telling you that you're meant for one thing, you can still choose otherwise.

As a dragon, I choose my fate with every breath I take.

It sounds like you might want to try the same.

[melancoffeea]

[Those are optimistic, uplifting words—but he's tired of fighting. Sandalphon takes a quiet but deep breath.]

Fine. I've heard what you had to say. This conversation is over.

[alttitude]

If that's what you want - just take care not to forget what I said.

[melancoffeea]

Oh, rest assured. I won't.

[Jae-ha probably won't let him forget. With that, Sandalphon will take his leave.]